If you had told me 4 years ago that I would be where I am today, I would have laughed at you and said "That's impossible." The world as I knew it didn't allow for such a scenario to exist. That being said, if you had explained to me what this place ACTUALLY looks like, I would have said that's even more impossible.
I used to think that the further you get in life, the easier it is. I thought that experience was the cure-all for everything. I thought that once you were established, you could go by your own rules and everyone else would have to follow or bug off.
To some degree I was right. I can do more, say more, and decide more than ever before. My vote is more valuable.
Here's where I was wrong: No matter how far you go, you can only go there with the help of other people. PEOPLE MATTER. it makes no difference how good I am or how much I know (which isn't very good, and not very much) if I don't take into consideration other people. People I work with, people I serve, and people I live with.
Here's the cool thing. On this journey, I've really learned to love people. It's been easy to care about feelings because I care about the person who has the feelings. I'm not sure what's come over me. For those who know me well know that I'm not a loving person by nature. Correction: I WASN"T a loving person by nature. I am becoming one.
"When I grow up" used to have a different ending.
I'm not the first baseman for the Oakland A's.
I'm not a business man.
I'm not without chest hair.
I used to think that the further you get in life, the easier it is. I thought that experience was the cure-all for everything. I thought that once you were established, you could go by your own rules and everyone else would have to follow or bug off.
To some degree I was right. I can do more, say more, and decide more than ever before. My vote is more valuable.
Here's where I was wrong: No matter how far you go, you can only go there with the help of other people. PEOPLE MATTER. it makes no difference how good I am or how much I know (which isn't very good, and not very much) if I don't take into consideration other people. People I work with, people I serve, and people I live with.
Here's the cool thing. On this journey, I've really learned to love people. It's been easy to care about feelings because I care about the person who has the feelings. I'm not sure what's come over me. For those who know me well know that I'm not a loving person by nature. Correction: I WASN"T a loving person by nature. I am becoming one.
"When I grow up" used to have a different ending.
I'm not the first baseman for the Oakland A's.
I'm not a business man.
I'm not without chest hair.
I am a becoming a loving person who cares about people.This is not easy.
It takes more energy.
It makes my job harder.
Being a jerk used to be so easy :)
Go love somebody.
7 comments:
I don't even know what to say, but I have to say SOMETHING. This is awesome news...I'm thrilled for you! Now, onward to greatness! :)
I have a sneaking suspicion that your wife had something to do with it.
What an awesome post Josh! How reflective. Thanks for sharing this and for the encouragement that it is. I am excited for you to see where this takes you and who this brings in your path. Again thanks for the post!
And you were so good at it :)
I feel like this part of you that really cares for people has always been there - you are one of the moost fiercely loyal people I know - maybe there is some part of you that is breaking down a bit -- with maturity comes a kind of openness. Even better than change - I think it is fuller realization of the person I have always enjoyed being around.
I was intimidated by the "tough guy" in you back in Chorale... although by looking at your beautiful wife and baby, and by reading about the awesome impact you're making through the music at your church, it's easy to tell you're full of love. Glad all is well, Josh. Take care!
Well, i didn't mean for this post to be SUCH the E! True GARLOW story REVEALED" post. Your responses have surprised me a bit.
Jodi - thanks for saying SOMETHING.
Julie - My wife HAS played a huge role in all of this, and so has my son.
Kim - I appreciate that you're encouraged by this. I'm not really looking for this to take me somewhere as much as I'm realizeing that this is getting me through my current life.
Sam - You're right. I was pretty good at it :) (still can be)
Kate - There's a blast from the past. I think you were perhaps one of the many who didn't really know me in college. I'm the farthest thing from tough. I just play tough on TV. proof: Sam's comments almost brought tears to my eyes. ALMOST.
Well... Thanks for reading.
Ah, I remember the time a certain loving blogger and friend tardy blogger "Nair"ed their chest hairs ending with burnt nipples in preparation for a Chorale trip. Those were the good ole' days.
Bea
Post a Comment